Tuesday, January 8, 2008

I Have Come to the Conclusion That Hookers Are Not for Me

A guy friend of mine and myself had been partying and didn't feel like going home, so we went to a whorehouse. It is not hard to do here in Reno, NV, all you need to do is drive to the outlying counties and there you are, whorehouse haven.

You walk into the place and the madam calls all the available girls to stand in a line in front of you for you to choose from. Most commonly the John delays his choice until later preferring to sit at the bar and have a $10 beer while he decides (at least this is what my friend and I did). Negotiations are not allowed to be made in the open area of the bar lounge area, when a girl approaches you she asks to take you to her room to discuss rates. In the 20 or so minutes it took for me to drink my beer I noticed quite a few Johns going back to negotiate only to return quite soon afterwards, obviously not having come to settle on a price. I was approached by a older Asian lady, she was attractive and I liked the idea of being with an Asian so we went to negotiate. A co-worker of mine who frequents these establishments had told me he pays $150 for a 1/2 & 1/2 (half blow job, half sex) so I had a mental parameter of where I needed to be. When I proposed my offer the prostitute scoffed and said she would only perform a hand job for a $150, which I realized later as I walked back to the parlor, relieved me. When I returned from my failed negotiation my friend was going to the back with another girl. Time had gone by and it was obvious that he had made an agreement as he was gone for 1/2 hour. When he returned we both left the whorehouse and returned home. He told me he paid $150 for the hand job and a bj with a condom on. He laughed at my story of the scowling Asian.

That was when I was 22. I am now 31 and found myself home on Craiglist looking at their "erotic" section. Here is a list of local girls with pictures, prices, and cell phone numbers for outcall (your place) or incall (their place) services. I decided to give it a try and got a girl to come over. It was all pretty awkward and I found myself actually faking orgasm so she would leave. I felt pretty scummy and showered three times before I went to bed that night. I have come to the conclusion that hookers are not for me.